Stop Wondering What You Don’t Have

There was a period of time last year when I basically refused to go out.

I wouldn’t say I was depressed – that’s a bit of an exaggeration for me – but I wasn’t happy. There were a lot of things going on, from my family to my non-existent love life – and no matter how hard I tried or how much I damned myself to be more hopeful, I just couldn’t get there. And when my friends all made fun plans to go bar hopping in Brooklyn or hit up a gimmicky club in the Lower East Side, I politely joined them for dinner and weaseled my way out of of the late night excursions.

Logically, I knew that staying home snuggled up with my pup wouldn’t get me closer to finding The Infamous Love of All Loves – but emotionally, I couldn’t stomach standing in some crowded place, having drinks spilled on me and drunken guys attempting to hit on me while slurring their words. I wasn’t in the mood for it and frankly, at the time, I didn’t believe it would actually help me meet anyone worth meeting (I’m still not convinced it will, for the record, but I do go out more now). But more than the immature 24-year-olds hitting on me or the blaring pop music…

…it was all of those girls.

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23 Things I Love About Being Single (in GIFs)

There are some things that really suck about being single. But then there are some awesome benefits of flying solo. When I start thinking about how annoying it is to go on bad date after bad date, wishing for my single days to end already and wondering where the hell is this guy I’m apparently going to end up with… I remember all of the reasons I actually love being single.

Here are just a few… (add your own in the comments!)…

1- Peanut butter and popcorn for dinner? Occasional glass(es) of wine with hummus, carrots and a hard-boiled eggs because I just want it instead of cooking? Grub from the food truck late at night? Ain’t nobody that’ll be laying next to me… so…

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And the Winner of the Self-Love Giveaway Is…

Thank you to everyone who wrote their self-love letter for Valentine’s Day. Remember, you can write these all year-long and I’ll publish them here. The page is already updated with this year’s entries.

I’m excited to announce that Kelly from Ohio and the blogger behind Eternally Single Kelly has won my very first giveaway! Kelly was selected at random and will be sent a prize pack with everything below. You can also read Kelly’s amazing love letter, too:

“You are beautiful. Take those special moments when you realized that you are just a glimmer of that person that used to think so many negative things. You have been through more than most people can say, and are a confident and strong woman. Remember that moment at the lake when he had to stop and what he was doing just to say how beautiful you are and know you deserve it. Remember all those little moments where you looked in the mirror and all that hard work paid off. You are smart, you are beautiful, and you are a force of nature all by yourself. Being with someone only improves you by making each one of you want to be even better person, and that is always your goal. “

I’ll be hosting my second giveaway in a few weeks, so keep a lookout. And congratulations Kelly! Keep self-lovin’!

Giovanni Flight Attendant Hair & Body Kit – $9.99
Amore Pacific Moisture Bound Refreshing Masque – $10 each
Illamasqua Powder Eye Shadow in Toxic– $20
Wet n’ Wild MegaLast Mega Last Nail Color – $2 each
Vidal Sassoon Color Protect Shampoo, Conditioner and Color Protect Creme – prices vary
TRESemme Keratin Infusing Smoothing Serum – prices vary
bliss Pout o Matic – $48
HomeGoods $50 Gift Card
A Love Addict-themed clutch from Stich803.
A Love Addict-themed card and mug from Freckled and Joyful

Introducing My New York: Butterfly Studio Salon

As much as I write about my relationships with men (and handsome strangers) and of course, myself, a big love of my life is this city. I’m not the only writer to feel like New York is this tangible, actual person that you have a relationship with – it’s difficult and confusing, inspiring and welcoming, all at the same time, off and on, again and again and again.

When I was doodling skylines and imagining what my New York City life would be like, there are so many things I never considered I would love. Like the calmness of the streets before the bodegas open and the school buses prepare for pick up and drop off. Or the conversations you have with taxi drivers, bartenders, baristas, subway strangers and waiters that not only teach you something, but stay with you. Or how neighborhoods become more than a tangled web of streets and numbers, but areas that are rich with memories and feelings that are almost nearly indescribable. Or how when the city knocks you to the ground, messes with your head and destroys every last piece of hope you ever had – the next day, it reminds you why you worked so hard to move here. Why of all the places in the world, you’d still choose to struggle here than to rest comfortably somewhere else.

And so, just as I share my  romances with you, I’m letting you in on the other part of my heart: My New York. The New York that is familiar and wonderful to me. So should you ever visit or decide to take a chance on the Concrete Jungle, you’ll at least have a list of things to try.

From restaurants and bars to salons and hot spots, every Thursday, I’ll review a new destination. If there’s anything you’d like to me write about or try, let me know.

First up, the lovely Butterfly Studio Salon:

I’ve recently started dying my hair brunette – even though I’m a natural brassy blonde. It was at the request of many of my friends that I go darker to make my eyes pop. Though I hate to be persuaded, they were so right! It’s a nice change that not only makes me feel more confident but sexier too. I’ve noticed that people take me more seriously, too as a brunette: they make eye contact, the type of men who hit on me are of a classier crowd and overall, I feel a bit more mysterious. But when you’re making a huge transformation to your hair, it’s important to go to a professional. And for me, I really trust Butterfly Studio Salon to take amazing care of me:

Where it is: Flat Iron district
My treatment: Single-process color, hair cut, style and blow out
What it’s great for: They use all L’Oreal products for their color and give a great Keratin treatment (Cezanne Perfect Finish) for frizzy fly-aways
Cost: Pretty pricey – but worth it for the expert experience
Atmosphere: Relaxing – they’ll offer you wine, tea or coffee upon arrival, no extra charge
What I Loved: How friendly the staff is! Sometimes at fancier salons, you’ll find the staff to be a bit pretentious, but everyone was welcome and helpful. My colorist, Aneesa really listened to what I wanted for my hair and made my color rich without going overboard.
What I Learned: I asked my stylist (Nicole) about the most important thing about hair when it comes to dating and she gave the best advice: you should feel beautiful for yourself, not for someone else. And it starts from within: once you are comfortable with who you are and feel really gorgeous -not for a man, but for you – that’s when you’ll attract the best mate.” Also – never, ever get a haircut or color right after a breakup!
Discount For Readers:  Visit the salon and receive 15% off your first color service – valid till 2/28!

 

Salon Collage

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This Valentine’s Day, write a self-love letter to yourself and it’ll be published (anonymous or not) on Confessions of a Love Addict! And you enter yourself to win a prize pack of beauty products and a Home Goods gift card! Learn more here. Submit here.

My Very First Giveaway!

You’ve all been giving me so much love in the past three-and-a-half years and finally – finally – I’m able to return the favor with some goodies. Thanks to the kindness of some awesome brands, one reader will win everything you see below (yes, everything!).

Here’s how to enter:

1Submit your own self-love letter that will be published (anonymous or not) by 5 p.m. EST on Thursday, February 13th. There is no limit or minimum to what you write and regardless if you choose to use your name or not, you’re still entered. You can see some examples of past self-love letters here.

2– Read all of the self-love letters – including your own!- on Friday, February 14 at 7 a.m.

3– Check back on the blog on Monday, February 17 at 7 a.m. to see if you won!

It’s really that easy. Share the love… and maybe you’ll win this:

unnamedWhat’s included:
Giovanni Flight Attendant Hair & Body Kit – $9.99
Amore Pacific Moisture Bound Refreshing Masque – $10 each
Illamasqua Powder Eye Shadow in Toxic– $20
Wet n’ Wild MegaLast Mega Last Nail Color – $2 each
Vidal Sassoon Color Protect Shampoo, Conditioner and Color Protect Creme – prices vary
TRESemme Keratin Infusing Smoothing Serum – prices vary
bliss Pout o Matic – $48
HomeGoods $50 Gift Card
(Not Pictured) A Love Addict-themed clutch from Stich803.
(Not Pictured) A Love Addict-themed card and mug from Freckled and Joyful